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Nick and Jessica
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Posted by: mykittykat88

Okay - tuned in to see Alias tonight....didn't know it wasn't on until 10. Saw the opening of the "Nick and Jessica Variety Show".....hmmmm. An obvious take-off on Sonny and Cher....one BIG exception. Jessica had on a Cher-type dress - they are missing the reason those dresses worked on Cher - she had no "bosoms"........ just gross on Jessica. UGH!!!!

Posted by: YCantAngieRead

Something with Nick and Jessica sucked? Shocker. Absolute shocker.

Posted by: CatBurger00

Heh, came here to start a thread taking bets on how long it will take before this "show" gets the axe. Anyone?

Posted by: ghettoblaster

quote:
Originally posted by mykittykat88
....one BIG exception. Jessica had on a Cher-type dress - they are missing the reason those dresses worked on Cher - she had no "bosoms"........ just gross on Jessica. UGH!!!!

gross? those "bosoms" are far from gross...

Posted by: CatBurger00

b00bies! :D

They finally did have a good joke during the mickey mouse club skit.

Jessica: Ok, Justin, you were raised in memphis, knock off the gangster speak" or something to the effect :)

Speaking of Jessica, can you say "overactor"? I was cringing during the jewel duet, and that didnt even require acting. She still managed to overact.

Posted by: Dexter1

Shouldn't this show be on Saturday mornings. Do they really expect adults to be entertained by this?

Posted by: cptodd

can someone please help me? I have been hearing about this Jessica (Simpson I bellieve) for a few months now. I have never heard of her before that. WHat is her story? Singer? Actress? Where did she come from and why is she so famous? Is she as ditsy as folks make her out to be?

Posted by: CatBurger00

Singer, along with Nick Lachey. They started dating a LONG time ago and got married just a little while ago.

As for her ditziness, well, she is to a certain extent, but like almost everything in the media/entertainment, it is exaggerated.

Posted by: MLR930

I loved it I guess you have to be a fan to enjoy it

Posted by: cptodd

Interesting. I will look her up in the iTunes music store just to hear what she sounds like.

Posted by: jsmeeker

quote:
Originally posted by cptodd
can someone please help me? I have been hearing about this Jessica (Simpson I bellieve) for a few months now. I have never heard of her before that. WHat is her story? Singer? Actress? Where did she come from and why is she so famous? Is she as ditsy as folks make her out to be?

She's a solo artist (i.e. a singer). She came from Richardson, TX (well, she could have actually lived in Dallas). She went to the same high school I did. Why is she famous? She got a good record deal. She was marketed well. She sings nicely, and she is SMOKING hot.

I don't know her in real life. She does seem to be pretty ditzy in her show "Newlyweds".

I meant to TiVo this variety show. I forgot to set it up.. :(

Posted by: zaknafein

quote:
Originally posted by cptodd
Interesting. I will look her up in the iTunes music store just to hear what she sounds like.

She is a gifted vocalist, probably the most talented of the parade of blonde pop stars that have been in the media over the last few years. I can't stand her music, but she is good at what she does.

Posted by: cwoody222

To add to the story: Nick was 1/4 of 'boy band' 98 Degrees. Another of the members is his younger brother. He's usually on "Newlyweds" (MTV reality show about Nick & Jessica) along with his bride too. (she's a non-celeb I believe)

Nick just came out with his first solo record. It's not doing well. He's pretty much riding coat-tails now.

PS I am pretty sure the show was a one-time special.

Posted by: ncsercs

People are admitting that they actually watched this show?

Posted by: MLR930

It could have been worse imagine if it was Britney Spears UGH

Posted by: scooterboy

quote:
Originally posted by CatBurger00
As for her ditziness, well, she is to a certain extent, but like almost everything in the media/entertainment, it is exaggerated.

Exaggerated? Check my sig.

Posted by: cptodd

quote:
Originally posted by scooterboy
Exaggerated? Check my sig.

OK THAT was funny! Do you think that she was kidding? Gale Norton is an evil (OK evil is strong but. . .) woman. Perhaps she was clowning her?

Posted by: cptodd

quote:
Originally posted by zaknafein
She is a gifted vocalist, probably the most talented of the parade of blonde pop stars that have been in the media over the last few years. I can't stand her music, but she is good at what she does.

I see! Well you know we can't have too many blond pop stars now can we? I am interested to hear her now.

Posted by: MLR930

quote:
Originally posted by cptodd
I see! Well you know we can't have too many blond pop stars now can we? I am interested to hear her now.

As a fan of hers I'd say listen to these songs:

I Wanna Love You Forever
Where You Are (Which is a duet she did with Nick a few years ago)

Posted by: cptodd

quote:
Originally posted by MLR930
As a fan of hers I'd say listen to these songs:

I Wanna Love You Forever
Where You Are (Which is a duet she did with Nick a few years ago)

Cool. I will probably never be a fan (man that sounds closed minded) because I am not a huge fan of pop but I can't wait to hear.

Posted by: TeeSee

I understand this was an attempt to test the waters for a revival of '70s style variety shows. This is the reason why I didn't watch this show. I didn't like variety shows in the seventies, and from what people have said so far in this thread, the format hasn't changed in 25 years, unfortunately.

quote:
Originally posted by cwoody222
PS I am pretty sure the show was a one-time special.

That's what I heard as well.

Posted by: Smiles

quote:
Originally posted by cptodd
OK THAT was funny! Do you think that she was kidding? Gale Norton is an evil (OK evil is strong but. . .) woman. Perhaps she was clowning her?

No, I'm sure she was serious. I missed the show, but as shameless camp, she (and Nick) make me laugh. I don't doubt that she assists her ditziness, but I also don't doubt she's a ditz. :)

Posted by: cptodd

well I am all for guilt pleasures (as long as one acknowledges them as such ;) )

Posted by: Snappa77

:up: I actually liked it. It was silly and fun. And Jessica is ALWAYS good to look at. (BTW: those T's are real)

She is a better singer than Britney but not a better singer than Christina. The MickeyMouse club skit was LOL funny.

I don't what it is about those 2. You can't help liking her and Nick.

I am glad this was a one time deal though. It would NOT work as a series.

Wonder how it did ratings wise? If anyone knows please post.

Only thing I didn't like was her "singer theatrics" during the Jewel song. First thing vocal coaches teach ppl to do is to tone that down. Don't need to over do it with facial expressions on every note.

Did I mention Jessica Simpson is great to look at. :D ;) :D

Posted by: scooterboy

Having watched them in Newlyweds, I'm very confident that she doesn't "assist" her ditziness at all. She's really that dumb.

She did things like call Nick on his cell phone just to ask him what animal pork comes from. Then of course there's the famous "Chicken of the Sea" incident. She's not smart enough to fake any of it.

But I can't stop watching her.

Posted by: FLbadgirl

I missed it last night and by the looks of this thread I didn't miss anything at all. From the previews that I saw, it looks similar to MadTV (the comedy is non existent) and I think that show absolutely sucks.

Posted by: Meinrad

She's just so hard to watch sing. You have this pretty blonde girl there that you think you'll enjoy watching. Then she starts singing and making all these strange faces and her hands flail around like she's having a seizure.

When her and Nick were singing I got you babe, he kept grabbing her hand. I was scared for Nick, I thought she would smack him in the face. Somone needs to help her before she really hurts herself.

Posted by: scubagal

I can't help it, I love her. Not her music, but I just want to adopt her! She has a great voice- but watching her actually sing is a little painful. She doesn't sing my 'type' of music, but she does have a great voice.

I do think she is that ditzy, but I blame her parents. First of all, her dad is way creepy. Her mom is so desperate to be her 'best friend', she doesn't and never did make this girl do anything for herself. If Jon Bonet Ramsey had lived, this is what she would have become. Jessica's parents have been pimping her out since she was 12 and living off her money. You can't blame a girl for not knowing how to do laundy or clean up after herself when she has never had to lift a finger her entire life. Thankfully, in interviews and stuff, she can laugh at herself and admits she is spoiled and ditzy, but she also says that MTV edits out a lot of the more domesticated stuff, because it doesn't make good TV.

I don't know how Nick stands her parents, if these two stay married, I can see when she hits about 30, she will wake up and realize how her parents have totally manipulated and controlled her, I see a 'Brooke Sheilds' kinda fall out with them. I mean come on, they do have another daughter, who is with that kid when her mother accompanies Jessica everywhere she goes and the dad is always in the background with his creepy stares and leering?

Ugh the MTV episode where she was doing her 'sweetest sin' video and her dad was practically getting off watching the playback.. I think EVERYBODY in that room felt dirty watching him.

That being said, I tivo'd this show, but haven't watched it yet.

Posted by: whitson77

She IS smarter than she comes off. I'm not saying she is really intelligent but she is playing up her ditziness.

Scubagirl is right, her parents both are frauds. Both have manipulated her. Her dad used to be my youth pastor when I was a kid. He had me fooled for a while, but after I finally saw his greedy nature, his sailor-like mouth (no offense to anyone, but it was weird on a pastor) and his fake side. He would often bad mouth kids in his own youth group. I decided it was time to move on.

Posted by: zaknafein

Her parents are very creepy. Her dad's interview during the Sweetest Sin video about how, now that she's married and having sex, she can sing songs about it was just....icky. The whole family just seems clingy to an extremely unhealthy degree.

Nick, OTOH, seems like a normal guy. Quite the contrast.

Posted by: whitson77

quote:
Originally posted by zaknafein
Nick, OTOH, seems like a normal guy. Quite the contrast.

I know. He must have been thinking about only ONE thing when he said, "I do."

Posted by: gtrogue

quote:
Originally posted by mykittykat88
Jessica had on a Cher-type dress - they are missing the reason those dresses worked on Cher - she had no "bosoms"........ just gross on Jessica. UGH!!!!

Ok, you are either a less endowed woman or a man who likes tall dark and handsome. No hetero man I know, including myself, would look at those boobies and be grossed out.
I found myself mesmerized by them. When Jessica wasn't on the screen my eyes drifted to the wall beside my TV and as soon as she was back they were radar locked on her. :)
I didn't think the show was that bad. Some of the sketches were kind of funny, the best ones being the self deprecating kind. I don't think they can keep doing the same jokes over and over again every week though.

I don't know about the rest of you but one of the reasons I like Jessica, besides her smokin' body, is that she seems like a generally sweet person. Perhaps it's only because the cameras are on her but she really seems like a nice, normal Texas girl, ditzy and pampered yes, but still somewhat normal. And Nick seems like a normal guy you could hangout with and talk about normal stuff. He's very down to earth. Oh my God. Did that sound gay?;)

Posted by: cpalma

quote:
Originally posted by scubagal
She has a great voice- but watching her actually sing is a little painful. She doesn't sing my 'type' of music, but she does have a great voice.

THAT'S IT! I was trying to explain to my husband what I didn't like about her and that sums it up nicely! It's painful to watch her! If you listen to her songs on the radio or close your eyes while watching, you can see that girl has got some talent, but she's almost a modern-day Joe Cocker!

I watched and think this show could have legs. Everything old is new again. I loved the skit with the PI and Mr. T. Very cute!

I don't watch Newlyweds--have only caught parts of 1 or 2 episodes. Speaking of her boobs (after my husband rolled his tongue back into his mouth), I was confused. In the bar scene I thought she was going to tip over (also very evident in the Dolly Parton scenes), but throughout the rest of the show, she looked much less endowed. Good bras?

Posted by: Dafaso

quote:
Originally posted by whitson77
I know. He must have been thinking about only ONE thing when he said, "I do."

Well, maybe two things.

Posted by: whitson77

Ah, you mean burying his like an ostrich? ;)

Posted by: Dafaso

~O~
:) :)
_/\_

Posted by: cwoody222

quote:
Originally posted by scooterboy
Exaggerated? Check my sig.

That's hilarious. Where did she say that?

Posted by: Smiles

quote:
Originally posted by cwoody222
That's hilarious. Where did she say that?

Uh, I'm guessing The White House. Maybe you should see if Newlyweds is auditioning. :D

(I read the quote in Newsweek.)

Posted by: scooterboy

quote:
Originally posted by cwoody222
That's hilarious. Where did she say that?

Here's one of many links.

Posted by: bonscott87

Ok, this thread is no good without pics! ;)

Posted by: lajohn27

Am I the only one who thought she was almost parodying Jewel's singing style when Jessica took over parts of the song?

And the best line of the show was an out-take in the credit sequence where Jessica called Kermit the Frog... "Mr Piggy.."

I thought the show had some 'fun' moments but overall it was very 1970's humor. Were they singlehandedly trying to revive ALL their guest stars careers?

I'm thinking that managers of certain celebrities must be praying nightly this show gets picked up. I'm thinkin in particular of :

Gary Coleman, David Hasslehoff, Ricky Schroeder, the entire cast of the Golden Girls, and Tina Yothers' from Family Ties..

:)

J

Posted by: tomo_kun

Geeze, one line from the monolog on SNL turns into somthing real, somone needs to get jessica some help.

Posted by: IJustLikeTivo

quote:
Originally posted by jsmeeker
I meant to TiVo this variety show. I forgot to set it up.. :(

With your frequent recordings of Britney, I thought for sure suggestions would grab this for you!

Posted by: YCantAngieRead

Of topic but someone touched on it earlier. Her Dad does creep me out in ways I can't even explain. Now, my own Dad is a minister, and he can sometimes swear like a sailor (I know a lot of ministers who can, actually) but none of them are so...itchy-making, whatever that means. He reminds me of every minister I've known and disliked for his taste for money and getting it at any cost.

As far as Jessica is concerned, she's a fantastic vocalist. I would bet she has perfect pitch. But I think she would do better as the new Amy Grant than what she's doing now. I think her pop style will wear out quickly.

Posted by: DreadPirateRob

quote:
Originally posted by Dafaso
Well, maybe two things.

Doh - beat me to it. That's what I get for not reading this thread. FWIW - this is *exactly* what I thought when reading what whitson wrote.

Posted by: cptodd

quote:
Originally posted by whitson77
She IS smarter than she comes off. I'm not saying she is really intelligent but she is playing up her ditziness.

Scubagirl is right, her parents both are frauds. Both have manipulated her. Her dad used to be my youth pastor when I was a kid. He had me fooled for a while, but after I finally saw his greedy nature, his sailor-like mouth (no offense to anyone, but it was weird on a pastor) and his fake side. He would often bad mouth kids in his own youth group. I decided it was time to move on.

Now there's a reality show for you: "When youth pastors go bad" Next on UPN!

Posted by: cptodd

quote:
Originally posted by whitson77
I know. He must have been thinking about only ONE thing when he said, "I do."

His and Her's matching china patterns? ;)

Posted by: Snappa77

The 2 men in her life seem complete opposites. Nick is probally the best thing that happened to her. I am glad she didn't go for someone who is like her father. My GF and I noticed how creepy he was too. I wonder if him and Nick get along.

Her sister is about to do a reality show too. I think they will follow her around as she attempts to make it int he music biz. I wonder if her parents pushed her into this.

I just watched the duet with Jessica and Jewel again. Her 'singing facial embellishments' twitching and mouth quivering are VERY VERY DISTRACTING. And really unneeded.

She is still great to look at though. :up: :up: :D ;)

Posted by: whitson77

quote:
Originally posted by cptodd
Now there's a reality show for you: "When youth pastors go bad" Next on UPN!

You are so wrong!

It would be on FOX!

Posted by: cptodd

quote:
Originally posted by whitson77
You are so wrong!

It would be on FOX!

DOH! You are right!

Posted by: dssdbs

quote:
Originally posted by Snappa77
Wonder how it did ratings wise? If anyone knows please post.

from: Jackson, Simpson Top Weekend TV Viewing Ratings

quote:
Sunday night's "The Nick & Jessica Variety Hour," featured the singing husband-and-wife duo of Lachey and Simpson, led its hour with an average of 11.4 million viewers and a 4.7 rating among adults ages 18 to 49, an audience prized by advertisers.

Posted by: ScottE22

OK - come on -- no one laughed at the "Nick LaShave" bit??? Please don't lose respect for me, but that was just so ridiculous it was LOL funny! :D

As for the rest, if there was nothing else on in the summer, I'd watch it -- but only on TiVo so I could FF. And maybe they should scale it back to 30 minutes.....

Posted by: scubagal

I finally watched it and it had it's moments.. I fast forwarded through some parts, but I can't help it, I am oddly fascinated by them.

I agree, Nick is the best thing that ever happened to her, she seems to need that type of grounding.

Posted by: Dafaso

I watched it last night and there were some funny moments. The opening skit with the Mr. T was kinda funny and I enjoyed the singing throughout. Mostly cornball, however. Of course, I'd watch them again. :)

Posted by: gtrogue

quote:
Originally posted by ScottE22
OK - come on -- no one laughed at the "Nick LaShave" bit??? Please don't lose respect for me, but that was just so ridiculous it was LOL funny! :D

As for the rest, if there was nothing else on in the summer, I'd watch it -- but only on TiVo so I could FF. And maybe they should scale it back to 30 minutes.....

I laughed. I laughed at a lot of stuff.

Posted by: jlb

I cannot get past one aspect of Jessica's singing.......it's hard to describe, but it seems a lot of Jessica, Britney types are doing it......

As best as I can say, it's like she's trying to make all of the consanants have a softer sound, or almost coming more from the diaphragm (sp?). If one were to really belt out a song, then this would not be a sound/style you would hear. Does anyone else get this?

Also, her mouth just seems so big. It's like the woman on Idol that Simon blasted for having such a big mouth.

That being said, I did find the show enjoyable in a very 70's Sonny and Cher way. It would be a hit then, but who knows what will happen now.

Posted by: jsmeeker

quote:
Originally posted by scubagal
I agree, Nick is the best thing that ever happened to her, she seems to need that type of grounding.

Yup. He's got a five year plan for her.

Posted by: tivospav

quote:
Originally posted by YCantAngieRead
I would bet she has perfect pitch.

I call that on-the-fly pitch correction. :) Without it, we wouldn't have pop music as it is today.

Posted by: grecorj

It got picked up -- there will be a Christmas special.

It actually bolstered Alias's ratings! :eek:

It was a terrific homage, perfectly executed actually. Could have used better "guest stars" but oh well - that's part of the homage I guess!

BTW, regardless of how creepy he his, her dad is certainly managing her career well.

Posted by: smak

quote:
Originally posted by jsmeeker
Yup. He's got a five year plan for her.

Yes, it's called having sex with her 1,826 times.

-smak-

Posted by: DougF

This was really on? I saw an ad for it in a magazine and thought it was a joke, poking fun at the current reality trend.

Man, it's not even summer yet. I thought we were only supposed to see crap like that then.

Posted by: cptodd

OK heard her on iTunes Music Store. Nice voice. Not interested in the genre. Does anyone else think she could not sing anything but pop?

Posted by: dssdbs

Nick & Jessica To Return For Christmas Special

quote:
The Nick & Jessica Variety Hour proved to be a ratings success, so Nick Lachey and Jessica Simpson will be back on television later this year in a Christmas special. Some 11.5 million people tuned in to watch the couple ham it up on Easter Sunday with Kenny Rogers, Jewel, Kermit the Frog and Miss Piggy, among others. ABC has not officially announced the holiday special, but a network source confirmed for E! that it will, in fact, take place.